The Choice

As someone that suffers from anxiety and depression, I know the idea of “happiness being a choice” can be rather maddening. Depression is a real thing. No doubt. Anxiety is real, and it’s so hard on mamas. So, if it’s a choice, you’re saying I’m “choosing” to be depressed?! Nope. Not cool and not true.
However, there are some choices I’m making for myself that DO help. Let me explain.

In church this weekend I heard these words and they stuck: “When you decide to break free”. Break free from what? What could I possibly decide to break free from? Woe is me, right? What about that longtime friend that I had to sever my relationship with for my own wellbeing? Am I still struggling over that? Yes. Did I make the right decision by saying goodbye to that person? Yes. Do I have the choice to forgive and move on? Of course I do! What about that thing my husband did 4 years ago that I still lose sleep over sometimes? It was 4 freaking years ago. I forgave, and forgave, and forgave again. I’m still allowing this to consume me? Come on now, Anna.

This is where the choice comes in. I’m not where I want to be at 30 years old. Do I still have great potential? How many blessings can I count for myself? The list is endless. I’m blessed just to be here on this earth, living another day. So why, oh why, would I waste my time letting my negative thoughts fester and make me believe I’m worthless? Screw those thoughts. The choice has to be made for every area of your life in which you are struggling. Sometimes I’m anxious and squirrelly and not even sure why. When I stop and try to identify why I’m feeling that way, 4 times out of 5 I realize that it’s not that important, and I need to calm my butt down. Sometimes I wake up and my day starts going completely wrong. From the start. But from the start, did I pray and read scripture, or jump on social media?

Almost everything is a choice. It’s a constant reminder that I may have to make for myself 100 times a day, in 100 different ways. But not only is this possible, it can become habit. These choices can become so habitual that they carry on into your daily life, and the rest is left behind. Your thoughts become just that- thoughts. They will no longer have the power to navigate your actions and control your life. Start making your choices.

💚 Anna

“Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.” -Robert Collier

2 thoughts on “The Choice

  1. Love you sweet mama! Life is hard, but you are oh so tough! You got This! And I am sure you will always make the better choice… 😗😗

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  2. Yes! My life motto is “choose joy”. You have a choice every minute of every day, so choose wisely and intentionally. This last year has been the hardest in my life and I too went through anxiety and depression after Graham’s diagnosis, but the choice is mine to pick myself up each day and keep going towards joy. Thanks for sharing!

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